Five Reasons to Either Love or Hate Starbucks

1) Number one will come as no great surprise to anyone who keeps up with the news. Thanks to Reuters (who said investigative journalism was dead?) it has emerged that Starbucks UK paid no corporation tax for three years. Critics urge a boycott, defenders point out Starbucks haven’t broken the law. The debate about tax evasion vs tax avoidance continues…

2) From finance to politics (dull, isn’t it?). A lobbying group known as “Dump Starbucks” are also calling for a boycott. Why? At the beginning of the year executive vice president Kalen Holmes released a statement titled “Starbucks Supports Same Sex Marriage“. Interestingly, Ben & Jerrys have come out (for want of a better phrase) with the same opinion. One group has managed to collect a whopping…285 signatures against them. *Snigger*

3) Zionism! Yes, that’s right; my love of Starbucks and Israel have collided. While the idea that Starbucks itself somehow supports Israel is false, the CEO Howard Schultz was honoured in 1998 with “The Israel 50th Anniversary Friend of Zion Tribute Award” for his services in “playing a key role in promoting close alliance between the United States and Israel.”

4) Firearms. And you thought the last point was a bit wacky. But yes, just as I’m beginning to scrape the barrel for ideas, my American friend informs me that the company support concealed carrying of firearms in US stores! Despite having the right as a retailer to ban customers from entering stores with weapons, Starbucks have declined, and therefore allowed themselves to be labelled pro-guns.

5) The taste. If you’ve successfully navigated yourself through the ethics and politics of tax avoidance, gay marriage, Zionism and guns then it’s time to grab a latte and sample the guilt-free taste. But alas! Coffee snobs complain the coffee is burnt and bitter. They claim Starbucks roasts their beans at a higher temperature in order to produce large quantities of beans in a short time. The high amount of sugar and syrups apparently make it more like “candy than coffee“. Have you fallen at the last hurdle?

If you’re in the fortunate place of agreeing or disagreeing with all five of these points then you have a water-tight argument either way. Some will say that because the company are screwing the government over, support same sex marriage, are gun friendly, love Israel and make excellent coffee then we should all buy more of their coffee.

The opposite could also be true. You could disagree with Starbucks’ take on thorny issues and dislike the taste.

But the vast majority will find themselves in a position where they neither agree or disagree with all of the policies. What then?

Well ladies and gentlemen, may I make a profound point here. May I suggest that when it comes to Starbucks, there’s only one point that has ever mattered. The taste.

I know, it’s a startling idea to consider: We should either enjoy or boycott a coffee company based on what their coffee tastes like! How profound.

So until you can find me a white cafe mocha that tastes even half as good as St Arbuck’s then you’ll know where to find me. Good day to you.